You Can Handle One or Two Drinks, Right?
You’ve been off the booze or dope quite awhile. You feel comfortable without it. You feel safe. You’ve got it licked. You can kick it again anytime you want. A drink or two won’t hurt.
Bullshit.
You’re kidding yourself. That’s the power of addiction. You’re never safe and secure. Your brains are deceiving you. One drink leads to two, two to three, three to oblivion. You’re right back where you started from.
How can you avoid the temptation? You can’t. Temptation will always be your companion. Your job is to avoid acting on the temptation.
I can’t advise anyone on the matter. I can only tell you what I have done so far.
First of all, I no longer refer to myself as an alcoholic. It sounds too polite, too antisceptic. It obscures the truth of acts while under the influence, the vomiting, the unprotected sex with strangers, the stink that floats with you, the hurt in your loved one’s eyes. I am just a common, slobbering drunk, nothing romantic, merely a garden-variety drunk doing my best to stay sober even after 25 years.
The second thing I had to do for my own survival was drop all of my drinking buddies and anyone else who reminded me of a drink. There can be human as well as alcohol triggers. A few people of my acquaintance were and remain toxic.
And then I stopped hanging around or even passing by the known locations of my habitual drunkenness. The added time it took to get to work was well worth it.
Finally, I felt a strong need to relocate and start from scratch. That was tough. Kids want to remain with their friends. It costs money to move. There are many tensions during and after a relocation. But for me, the end result was better. I don’t regret it.
These are just some thoughts, things I kick around in my (sober) mind from time to time. They may or may not work for other people. We are each different. Whichever path you choose, I wish you the best.
Tags: Avoiding Temptation, Triggers
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